My Annual Conference Report

Next week as the senior pastor of a Free Methodist Church I am required to turn in a report to my superintendent in which I must enumerate how many people in my church have been "converted." Being a the fussy, troublesome little pastor that I am, I asked the conference to define for me "conversion" to which I was greeted by the following very brief reply:

"The directions for lines 4 and 5 say that conversions are those
who have prayed to receive Christ as their personal Savior..." So, that would mean salvation. How many youth and how many adults were saved during 2008?"

I knew, of course, that such would be the answer. But having taken an entire graduate course on Christian conversion, I was curious to note how my denomination defines "salvation." Evidently, what they want me to report is how many people I was able to cajole into saying the magic words (i.e. the "sinner's prayer" -- Notice that we call this the "Sinner's prayer" and not the "Sinners' prayer" denoting our individualistic outlook on sin and salvation). But I have come to believe over the past 10 years of biblical and theological study that the reduction of the mystery of salvation to the pronouncement of a few magic words is an absurdity and does a grave injustice to the biblical concept of soterios or telios or sozo.

I would like to offer an alternative conference report to the one I am being forced to turn in this week. It would look something like this:

Number of prostitutes who have been told that they are made in the image of God and wept over that fact: 3

Number of addicts who have admitted their bondage, confessed their sin, and sought help through group accountability: 10

Number of sexually abused women who have thrown themselves down at the altar and asked God to heal them: 4

Number of dysfunctional or mentally ill teenagers who have been educated by patient people in the church and listened to for hours on end: 5

Number of hungry mouths fed: easily over 2,000

Number of inner city kids who have now memorized over 3 chapters of the Bible: 5

Number of pastors who have been completely and totally broken down before God and cried out for his help: at least 1

Number of men weekly attending AA in our church basement: 6

Number of people who have smiled and said, "Thank you for what you do; it has given me hope": at least a dozen.

Number of times members of the church have responded to insult or abuse with kindness and patience: thousands.

Now I know that the conference wants the "bottom line." They want me to tell them how many I "got in" so that they can do their little denominational tally. I know that if my number were high enough, my church's name would be read on a list at annual conference as a role model for others. But I don't really want to give them that. Instead, I'd rather tell them stories, show them pictures, and let them eat at our table alongside the poor.

But, alas, this is America. We want numbers -- numbers of "conversions." My suggestion is that we stop counting conversions and start counting conversations.