Voices

Dude, what the hell is going to happen with Greg? That guy seems to be going kinda crazy.  I'm worried about him because it seems like he might be going through a kind of nervous breakdown or midlife identity crisis or whatever you want to call it.  Even HE admits that he thinks he could be losing his mind.  And then there's the whole addiction thing.  So sad. That poor guy just can't catch a break.  He goes to the inner city because he thinks God is calling him there, then he gets his ideals crushed and loses his faith, he tries the only option available to him: teach.  And he's good at it too! But with his luck all the theology teaching jobs are drying up as education changes. Then, of course, this year happened... the divorce, rehab, total loss of faith, separation from his daughters... God, I cannot even imagine that!  I wonder how I would do if all of that was taken from me all at once.  I kinda wanna say something helpful to him, but don't even know what to say.  I have no idea what he's dealing with and it seems like I'd be lying if I said something like, 'I understand what you're going through ' because I don't!  I guess no one's pain is the same.  Pain can't be weighed or measured.  It's a mystery.  So... all I can do is pray and hope.  Let's trust Greg to God.  Whatever happens, it'll sure be interesting! Lol.

Why doesn't that guy just pull his shit together? Look at all he has! He has this huge network of friends and family and he just takes it all for granted.  Typical white male privilege.  Here's a guy who is born 1) white, 2) male, 3) straight and in 4) the United States of America! Talk about winning the lottery! So why the hell doesn't he just pull his shit together, get up off his ass, and work like the rest of us!  He thinks he's got some kind of monopoly on suffering, but listen, man, we all suffer so just get over it!

Poor Greg and his Coates family! It must be so humiliating to be such an important family in the Free Methodist Church and have a child that goes so, so, SO far astray!  We should pray for him.  He is so LOST.  We need to get on our knees and pray that he will come back to the flock. Oh, I would hate to be Herb and Sheryl!

Greg is so deeply mentally ill that he is a lost cause.  I'm amazed he hasn't already done himself in.

I wish Greg could just get out of his head.  His brain has always been his bane and his blessing.  He needs to just get out and work with his hands, rub shoulders with other humans, etc.  He knows the way forward, but he just doesn't take it!  He knows that meditation and yoga and eating healthy and exercise would be crazy good for him, but he just doesn't do it!  It's almost as though he wants to be miserable. Ugh. It's maddening.  I wish I could just get out there and do it for him but I can't. I sure do love Greg though.

Have you seen him lately? Greg doesn't even look like he used to.  His unshaven beard and mop of messy hair.  The guy basically LOOKS homeless. And I heard that he smokes pot now. Poor guy, he's jumping out of one addiction and right into another. Then again, some say he has PTSD and that he's just medicating himself.  I don't know what I think about that.

What a self-pitying, entitled prick.

I don't think Greg is a very good father.  If he were he would figure out a way to be more present in his girls' lives.  What's his deal? What kind of a man abandons his own children?!? There's a special place in hell for people like that.

Who is Greg again?

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Me, now:

Well, God, I do fear their judgement.  I hate shame and rejection.  I hate it more than death. And those voices are always in my head, but here's what I know: You love me just as I am.  I believe, now help my unbelief. Amen.